6 Tips for Giving a Great Wedding Speech
I went to a wedding over the weekend and had the opportunity to listen to at least 7 different speeches given by the family and friends of the happy couple. The content of all the speeches was very heartfelt and warm, and written from a deep affection for the couple. However, in terms of how the speeches were delivered… well, that’s where there may be some ‘cracks in the pavement’ for some of them.
Of course, it’s not easy to get up in front of a room of 300 people, many of them strangers, and deliver a speech. So I applaud each and every speaker for making the decision to put yourself in this situation and having the courage to give a speech.
Some speeches had an “edge” to them – they were delivered loud, clear and with humor. The others had some ‘issues’, which could have been easily resolved, which would have made them even more welcome. So, based on my sample size of 7 wedding speeches, here are six tips on how to give a great wedding speech, divided into 2 categories: sound issues and delivery issues.
SOUND PROBLEMS
By far the biggest problems came from trouble hearing the speakers – there was a lot of “what did she say?” happening. But there was nothing wrong with the sound system. So speakers, take note:
1. Speak into the microphone. Take it directly to the mouth if necessary. Every sound system is different, but chances are if it’s more than 4-5 inches from your mouth, your audience won’t hear it very well.
2. Speak clearly and slowly, and don’t mumble. In one-on-one discussions, many of us speak ‘under our breath’, which means we lower our voices and don’t say things as clearly. Just as hard to understand are fast talkers. When we’re happy and excited, some of us tend to talk a little faster. While this might work with one-on-one conversations, it doesn’t work when you have a microphone in hand and 300 people straining to hear you. So slow down and speak clearly.
DELIVERY PROBLEMS
3. Make eye contact with all sides of the room when you speak. Yes, the speech is about, and TO, the bride and groom. But never forget that there is a whole audience listening to your speech, and they deserve to be addressed too.
4. Smile, be upbeat and energetic, and pretend you’re happy to be there (even if you’re so nervous you want to throw up).
And don’t worry if you’re shaking and your paper is shaking. Nobody expects you to be perfect, and most (if not all) of the audience will give you credit for getting there in the first place. And rest assured, there are plenty of people in the audience who wouldn’t be as willing to give a speech as you are. Ever.
FINALLY, A QUICK WORD ON THE CONTENT:
5. Add stories. Everyone loves to hear stories about the bride and/or groom. But choose your stories carefully and make sure they have a relevant point. Example: “Karen was able to learn a fully choreographed dance routine in a matter of hours, which shows how passionate and driven she is.” Make sure the story supports the point you’re trying to make about the person.
6. Switch between the second person (“you”) and the third person (“John”). Whenever you want to speak directly to the boyfriend, feel free to do so, as in “John, I can’t believe how lucky you were with this girl.” Mix it up by talking to the audience ABOUT Jon, as in “Who would have thought Jon would get lucky with such an amazing girl?” This way, he’s having a conversation with the audience AND the bride/groom, and everyone feels included.
Giving a wedding speech is no different than giving a speech anywhere else. Remember that you are speaking to a room full of people, not just the bride and groom. Create a sincere, funny speech filled with stories that make a point. Rehearse extensively. And when you’re on stage, make sure you speak loud and clear into the microphone. Then, enjoy the accolades of delivering a memorable speech that you’ll receive compliments on for a long time to come.
********************************************