How to break a bad habit: 5 powerful tips
How to break a bad habit is a topic that puzzles many people. Too often we persist in behaviors that can have negative and sometimes life-threatening consequences, but like the Energizer bunny, you just go on and on and on…
To begin with, it is useful to consider what is meant by habit. Our friend Webster defines it as “a pattern of habitual behavior”. What is also known is that thought, feeling, and action can be divided into two broad categories, conscious and subconscious.
The conscious mind refers to the part of the self that is critical and analytical; think and reason. This is the part of the self that recognizes that any reward or satisfaction that comes from problem behavior will be outweighed by its consequences.
Your subconscious mind refers to the part of you that is habitual and automatic, it doesn’t think or reason, it just responds the way it has been conditioned to do so. Most habits are benign and even helpful, like brushing your teeth, automatically using a turn signal when driving, etc. However, habits can also be terribly destructive, as in the case of those who continue to use alcohol and drugs in destructive ways even when the negative results are obvious.
So is there anything that can be done? Sometimes it is necessary to get outside help, especially if the situation poses imminent health and safety. However, whether you get professional assistance or not, here are five tips that you might find helpful.
Expect it to feel weird at first when you stop. Try this experiment. Interlock your fingers and see which thumb rests on top, the right or the left. Now pull them apart and intentionally hold them again with the opposite thumb at the top. Feels weird, right? Any change, good or bad, will feel uncomfortable at first; it usually takes about a month for it to feel normal to you.
Overcome the notion of helplessness. It is a popular opinion that many problem behaviors are lifelong and uncontrollable, but the science behind this notion is poor at best. Quite a few people, for example, drink alcohol to excess during their college years and then discontinue this unhealthy behavior as work and family responsibilities take on more prominent roles. Believe it or not, the most successful method of overcoming problem behavior is simply deciding to stop. Expect to evolve.
See behavior in the total context of your life. Remember the Rolling Stones song about “I can’t get no, SATISFACTION!” Is it that you are an “addict” or just unhappy with your life in general? Public health data tells us that while 10% of doctors and lawyers smoke, more than 60% of waitresses are smokers. The first group probably tends to find life more satisfying than the second. What active steps would you need to take to improve your personal, professional, and spiritual life? Drinking/smoking/drugs/overeating certainly isn’t doing the job!
Intentionally remove cues from the old behavior. Although we hardly recognize it, most of our actions follow a predictable sequence of events, where a stimulus provokes an unconscious reaction. Do you drink excessively with a certain group of people? Stop hanging out with them!
Remember that you are worth it! You may feel ashamed of yourself because of your past behaviors. This can set a trap in which you do not feel worthy of a better life, which in turn makes you turn off that pain with the habit that has complicated your existence. Consider accepting this idea. You are worthwhile simply because you were born as a child of human parents. There has never been anyone like you in the past, nor will there ever be another person exactly like you in the future. There is a reason you are here right now: find it.