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Glass heart syndrome

Pain is a healthy warning sign that helps us address problems. You cannot escape the pain. No matter how lonely or prickly you act, pain will find it and inflict it. Pain exists to teach us instincts for caution and survival. Pain is good and normal.

I have a heart of foam rubber. However, I have acted in the past as if my heart were made of glass and every wound shattered my confidence. Even when repaired, fissures and cracks are clear on a glass heart. Rather than fear the inevitable, I accept that pain is a normal part of life. Most people hurt us by thorny defense mechanisms to protect their own crystal hearts. If everyone stands up for a perceived crystal heart, what can we do to cut through conflict and pain?

Now my foam heart recovers, retains color, and is full again after every pain. It’s tough and part of the cure. Seeing those who hurt us as suffering makes it easier to reach out in kindness. Magically, it also dissolves perceived evil! Even better, things don’t hurt that much. Defensiveness is gone. If the heart recovers, there is no fear of being overwhelmed by pain.

We cannot predict where and when pain will strike. Try to be resilient without harshness or avoidance in the face of challenges. Getting prickly does not protect you from pain and anything negative will cause pain to someone else. We can stop the cycle of reacting to pain with defensiveness, anger, and avoidance. This slimy cycle keeps us all hurting each other.

Close your eyes and imagine your heart as something soft like ‘flubber’ or foam instead of glass or stone. What happens to the stone under too much pressure? Stone cracks. The glass breaks. My red foam heart can bounce. To be free from fear is to accept the fact that pain is inevitable. Set your standards, be polite, and protect your friends and family to the best of your ability by having clear boundaries. Accepting that all pain is inevitable does not mean that we are powerless to stop abusers.

You can avoid unnecessary conflict by acknowledging the reason for the pain. Is the person acting out of his own pain? This will guide you on how to reach out or cut off the source of the pain. That’s what pain is for! It is a warning so that we can live better, help others, and stop the cycle of fear of the unknown. What kind of sturdy material is your heart made of?

Give it a try for a week and see if your world is “less thorny”.

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